WWE Programming is blind, deaf, and dumb....

So Monday night's Raw ended with King/General Manager William Regal demanding that the crew in the production truck cut off the transmission right in the midst of the main event title match between new champion Triple H and former champion Randy Orton. As a result, the screen went black before being abruptly cut off.

Then, last night on ECW, right before the main event, play by play commentator Mike Adamle mysteriously got up -- mid-sentence -- left the announce table, walked behind the barricade, and exited the arena. Moments later, a confused Tazz followed suit (but not before politely promoting the show's sponsor!), leaving viewers with a silent, muted main event.

Now, I just can't decide if ECW's conclusion goes into the category of "say no evil" as the announcers bailed, or "hear no evil" as the viewers were left with silence. Nevertheless, I can't wait to see what shenanigans will occur at the conclusion of Friday's Smackdown. I guess, what, shooting the boom mic operator will complete the trifecta?

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A Case of the.... Lost - Episode 4-9

First things first: Does this mean that Scott and Steve are now BOTH dead???

So Sunday afternoon I returned from my friend’s wedding in South Carolina, and after a day and a half or so of relaxation, what else is there to talk about other than the latest episode of Lost?

http://primetimepulse.insidepulse.com/2008/04/29/a-case-of-the-lost-episode-4-9/

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So nice in SoCar (TM Matt Basilo)

So yesterday I got back from my friend's wedding in South Carolina. Before I get to how incredibly awesome it was, let me rant about my traveling woes.

I flew out of LaGuardia, which was a first for me. Nine times out of ten, I fly out of Newark, undoubtedly the nicest of any of the Port Authority locations. But LaGuardia offered a reasonable rate and a direct flight, so I took it. And let me tell you....it was pretty ghetto. First off, a tip is expected for pretty much every single thing anybody does. I took one of the airport run shuttles from the parking garage to my terminal, and there were -- no exaggeration -- THREE signs on the window asking for tips. I can understand if the driver was helping you lug really heavy bags, but I had a backpack and a small carry-on-sized suitcase, both of which I carried myself. He essentially drove me from A to B, doing absolutely nothing outside the realm of his very basic duties. Yet I still had to tip him a couple bucks. And since I checked in online, I used the outside kiosk to check my itty bitty bag. And yes, there was a sign asking for a tip. Ridiculous.

And unlike Newark and JFK, when the gateway takes you directly into the plane, the gateways at LaGuardia takes you to the runway, where a shuttle takes you to the plane (surprised we didn't have to tip there!)

The way back wasn't much better. There were several absolutely adorable children at the wedding, making my sentimental uncle-ly instincts (my sister is due in September) hit its peak. Well, at the airport and on the flight were a wide array of very noisy children, basically leveling out those emotions. While waiting in the terminal, these children were loud, but innocent enough. Suddenly this really snobby, elitist-like woman comes over, puts her bags on two seats, sits on another, and makes the children leave their spot. So she can take up five seats (one for herself, two for HER children, and two for her bags). And every time the children would make noise, she'd look up with this disapproving, annoyed look. She even asked the father "where are you guys sitting?" pretty rudely making it clear that she doesn't want to be near them.

Oh, it gets worse. Of course, it turned out she and her family were sitting right in front of me and next to me. One of her sons was mentally challenged, and HE was put in charge of our emergency exit door. We were also delayed TWO hours because they couldn't lock the front door. Sheesh, what a nightmare!

Thankfully, though, all of that was more than eclipsed by my incredible few days in SoCar (this nickname WILL catch on, mark my words!) I arrived Thursday afternoon, where the groom (Dave) picked me up on the airport. After running a few errands, we went to the great cottage that he had rented for us and his two other friends. That evening, we went on a small cruise, and that night dined at the bride's (Katie) parent's house for a delicious BBQ. Trust me, there's nothing like a Southern BBQ.

The next day we went to the beach for a couple hours. We also grabbed an absolutely bite to eat at Waffle House. We don't have that in the North (not in New Jersey, anyway), so it was a real treat. A delicious treat at that. We then headed off to the wedding location for the rehearsal, where we were interrupted by.....an alligator! Yeah, that bad boy -- while relatively little -- came awfully close. Thankfully, there were no casualties. Afterwards, we had the rehearsal dinner, which was highlighted by some oyster shucking (once again, delicious), fried chicken, and pulled pork. Honestly, I'd be shocked if I didn't put on a few pounds after those two days alone (no comments).

That night Dave took me and his other friend, Greg, to this hotel called The Sanctuary. For me to call this place posh and luxurious would be an understatement, to say the least. After a beer, we blindly decided to go to Charleston. It was the night before his wedding, after all. However, we had a bit of trouble finding a good place to go. One of the places we happened upon was this really hipster-like dive bar. The type of place where the bathroom stall doesn't have a door. But the people there are all playing chess, Connect Four, and Scrabble! You read that right...

The next morning we went to the beach for a couple of hours before preparing for the wedding. The event itself was absolutely beautiful. It was a bit overcast, and it was thundering a bit, but the rain held off, so they were able to do everything outside.

The reception was great as well, with -- yep, you guessed it -- some delicious food! And it was a buffet, so you didn't even have to choose between the great meals being offered. I did have to make a short speech (pictured above), which I was really nervous about. But I persevered and got through it. But I was a sweaty mess, due to the combination of the bright lights and my nerves. In a funny moment, shortly after the speech, one of Dave's family friends walked over to me with his dinner napkin and started patting down my forehead.

Overall it was a magnificent time, and I'm truly honored that I had the opportunity to play a part in it. I wish my friends, Dave and Katie, a great marriage and a lifetime of happiness. You guys did a great job with the wedding!

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Real quick note...

I'll discuss the wedding festivities later today, but there was something I wanted to mention last week, but never had a chance to. This goes into the category of "little touches I love," but during last week's King of the Ring tournament, CM Punk did the "Macho Man Treatment" (TM Matt Basilo) when he wore three different trunks in each of his matches. In his first match with Matt Hardy he wore his black with white trim trunks, in his next one against Jericho he wore his black with blue trim trunks, and in the finals against Regal he wore his blue with black trim trunks. Nicely done, Mr. Punk. Unfortunately you didn't take home the crown, unlike your predecessor.

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A Case of the.... Smallville - Episode 7-16

So I'm back from my friend's wedding in South Carolina, and although it was an absolutely phenomenal time, I'm absolutely exhausted. I will write all about my adventures a little later this week. But until then, here's my latest Smallville column posted on Prime Time Pulse (I haven't watched this past week's episode yet, so this is for "Descent"):

http://primetimepulse.insidepulse.com/2008/04/25/a-case-of-the-smallville-episode-7-16/

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Gone til Sunday

Well, loyal readers (reader?), I'm off to SoCar (that's South Carolina to you squares) until Sunday, so you've all got a reprieve from my next rant. One of my best friends from high school is getting married, and your friendly neighborhood blogger will be acting as best man (well, co-best man to be technical). The weather is supposed to be beautiful, and a lot of fun stuff is planned, so I'm really psyched for what is sure to be a great trip.

May I just note, though, how much I hate packing. It's not so much that it takes time, and that you have to fit everything into a suitcase, it's just that -- no matter what -- I ALWAYS feel like I'm forgetting something. And it's not even that I have any reason to think this. I don't recall ever taking a trip and arriving at my destination only to realize that I forgot to pack underwear or something.

Making matters worse is that I really don't have to bring much at all. I'm picking up my tux there, so Saturday's attire is handled. I don't really have to worry about an outfit for Sunday, because I leave early that afternoon. That really just leaves Thursday and Friday. So with so little packed, I REALLY feel like something is missing.

Anyway, when I get back, I'll be sure to write up a commentary on last week's INCREDIBLE Smallville episode. If I have time to, I might be able to do it tonight. Then hopefully sometime in my absence, Inside Pulse will get around to posting it. Anyway, be back Sunday!

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Wade Keller is a real dick

Let me preface this by saying that I don't like Mike Adamle (who most of you probably remember as the host of the original American Gladiators), and I think that him replacing Joey Styles as ECW's play-by-play commentator was a HUGE disappointment. That said, in last week's coverage of ECW on Sci-Fi, Wade Keller of PWTorch.com was unnecessarily harsh.

I mean Keller absolutely, positively tore this guy a new one. Honestly, you would have thought Adamle raped Keller's puppy or something. Give the page a read -- practically the entire column is filled with quotes of what Adamle had said and why he's an idiot for saying it. Keller tore apart every single little thing Adamle said, and a lot of the times the criticisms didn't even make sense.

For example, Keller says: Adamle said Kofi's "reputation preceded him here" because he got a great ovation. Huh? That makes no sense. Not even a little bit.

Actually, that statement makes perfect sense. People are cheering for him because of his past achievements. By that line of reasoning, they are already aware of his accomplishments. Hence, his reputation precedes him.

This actually reminds me a few weeks ago, when Keller decided that he'd like to sound ultra evolved by sticking up for homosexuals by chastising John Cena for making fun of Randy Orton for liking My Two Dads. Hey, I fully agree that it's lame to call somebody "gay" as an insult. But too bad My Two Dads has nothing to do with gay couples. He's basically saying that Orton likes corny 80's/90's sitcoms -- but hey, good for you for sticking up for the little guy!

Making matters worse, in his virtual time coverages -- which are not live, mind you. Keller can easily edit his work before publishing each section -- contains countless errors. He constantly mixes up wrestlers' names or what people said. Hell, I've even seen him incorrectly state who won the match! Actually, you know what? Lets look at some of the gems from last night's Raw coverage (Keller's stuff appears in blue italics):

1 -- CHRIS JERICHO vs. MVP - King of the Ring Quarter-Finals
MVP dominated the vasty majority of the first nine minutes....WINNER: Jericho in 5:00 via tapout.

So let me get this straight....MVP dominates the first nine minutes, but the match is only 5 minutes long? Incredible! And this is only the first match.

And what the hell is "vasty"??!?!

It's too risky to do on live TV, but it'd be fascinating to watch matches between wrestlers who really didn't know until ring introductions whom they were facing and didn't know until the ref told them before the bell how long they had and who was going over and how.

Yes, that would be fascinating. If only there was some sort of cyber-related Pay-Per-View in which they did something like this.

Ross announced that the four-way main event had become an Elimination Match with all four men in the ring at once to start.

No, actually they announced that the match wouldn't end until one person remained. Hence why it is now "elimination."

A promo aired with JBL. He predicted he'd become the King of the Ring.

If by "King of the Ring" you mean "WWE Champion," then yes Wade, you're spot-on.

4 -- WILLIAM REGAL vs. HORNSWOGGLE - King of the Ring Quarter-Finals
Finlay ran up to grab Hornswoggle away from Finlay, who was unable to do anything with his injured leg.

Really, so Finlay ran up to grab Hornswoggle away from himself? Amazing! And we're still on the first hour of a three hour show, folks.

They went into a nice serious of pin attempts and counters.

I'm glad that their pin attempts weren't joking around.

-A gaggle of Divas walked to the ring to Maria music. Maria, Ashley, Candice Michelle, Cherry, and Kelly Kelly stood together in the ring.

Yeah, Candice Michelle wasn't there.

Chavo's ring entrance took place during the commercial.

Or it happened during the show, in between JBL and Edge's entrances. But I can see how easily you could miss something as subtle as somebody coming out to music and doing exaggerating mannerisms while the announcers talk about him.

See how easy it is to make somebody look like an incompetent tool by putting every single little thing somebody writes or says under the microscope?

Last year I took advantage of an offer to get a couple of free issues of Pro Wrestling Torch, and I was really unimpressed. I expected something like a newspaper, instead I got something that resembled those tri-fold pamphlets you get at church. It was basically material that appears on their website, with numerous spelling and formatting errors.

Basically, the best thing about the PWTorch is Grant Gould's artwork.

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My weekend as a P.A.

So this past weekend I had the interesting opportunity to be a Production Assistant (P.A.) for a short film titled "Daren & Si." The intention is for this 15 minute movie to be shown at various film festivals, with the hopes that somebody within the industry will fund it to become a full length feature. Aside from one of the actors continually calling me "Mark," it was an excellent and worthwhile experience.

Probably the first thing I realized is how spot-on The Simpsons "Radioactive Man Movie" episode is. When the director says "Perfect! Lets shoot it again! And again and again!" -- that's really true to life. Even when a scene is shot perfectly, they do it countless more times from different perspectives and camera angles. To give you perspective, a 15 minute film took four days to shoot.

My job was basically to be a "gofer" by picking up breakfast and coffee every morning, picking up lunch, going to stores to pick up any necessary items, and taking care of any errands. As such, I wasn't able to view the entire production, but it was really, really interesting watching a film -- even a very short one -- being made.

While it is common knowledge that movies and television shows aren't filmed in sequence, it's quite an experience actually seeing this process in action. For example, much of the end of the film was shot on the first day of filming (Friday). As such, the lead actress was severely in emotional distress. Actually, she did such a wonderful job getting "into character" that the entire first day that I worked with her, I thought she was a bit cold and stand offish. It wasn't until the next day, when we started filming the "lighter" scenes, that I realized she was an extremely friendly and warm person.

I first realized how nice she was when she quite kindly handled the hamburger situation for the BBQ scene. Basically, I was asked to BBQ some burgers for a scene that would be shot later in the day (so that they wouldn't lose time preparing the burgers for the ACTUAL scene). If I may say so myself, I barbied these babies up to perfection. Unfortunately, we didn't get to that scene until, like, two hours later. So by the time her and her "father" had to eat them, they were really cold, really dry, and really hard. I attempted to reheat them, which ultimately made them really dry, really hard, and really overcooked. And because of numerous takes, she had to eat, like, three of them.

I learned a couple of other things about filming a movie as well. I'm not quite sure how to phrase this without coming off as offensive, but one thing I noticed is that when you're filming in a lower-class area, people REALLY don't want to appear on camera. This happened on two occasions. One day we filmed in a thrift store, and while we're clearly filming, one women starts asking -- quite loudly, and from a distance -- "What are you filming?" We're ignoring her, because we can't talk while we're filming. She then starts yelling "Hello? Hello? What are you filming?" Finally the producer walked over to her to quietly explain the scenario.

Similarly, Monday afternoon we shot at this really, really skeezy dive of a bar (incidentally, another thing I learned is that a fair amount of people drink at sketchy bars in the middle of the day). One of my assignments that day was to stand outside to tell people who were about to enter that we're filming. They were allowed to go inside, they just had to sign a release and were instructed to act natural and not look at the camera when they walk in. They were even told that we'd buy them a beer for their trouble. But even then, a lot of people were very turned off by appearing on camera. Humorously, though, one of the people who was about to go to the bar (at about 3:00 in the afternoon on a Monday) was this kid I went to high school with.

After seeing the "making of" process, I look really forward to seeing the finished product. I worked with some really talented, friendly, and patient people, and it really could not have gone better. And hey, maybe my next assignment will be a Rachel Bilson production!

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Juno

So last week I finally saw Juno. While I really enjoyed the film, and I thought all of the central characters did a fantastic job with their roles, I didn't think it was nearly as brilliant as virtually everybody else praised it as.

Overall, I thought it was a really sweet film. A lot of people have accused it of being unrealistic, but I disagree. I certainly don't think the events are out of the realm of possibility (there are parents out there who would unconditionally support their pregnant daughters, and there are teenage girls out there who would opt to put their baby up for adoption instead of getting an abortion).

One thing I did appreciate about the film was that it didn't feel the need to hammer home certain points (which, in general, is a big pet peeve of mine). Some people have expressed disappointment over Juno's apparent lack of emotion regarding her pregnancy and giving up her child, but I liked the fact that she didn't go on some verbal rant about how difficult it would be to give up her baby. Instead, it was expressed through some really understated, subtle ways. I believe that Juno's desire to become attached with the adoptive parents was absolutely her way of coping with her loss. Do you think she honestly cares about whether two virtual strangers get a divorce? Of course not. The only reason she cares about their relationship is because it will, in her mind, impact the way her baby is raised.

However, the one thing that really irked me was the dialogue. For the most part, I HATE the really fake, contrived language that so many writers insist on having their teenage characters speak. For the life of me, I don't understand how anybody can sit through an episode of Gilmore Girls for this reason. Even Dawson's Creek was unbearable at times. I'm sorry, but the vast majority of teenagers do not get into philosophical arguments. And when they do argue, they don't use super intelligent, thesaurus-laden words and phrases.

One might defend these examples by stating that these characters are supposed to be "quirky" or "outcasts." I could accept that, except for the fact that practically every character on those shows speak this way. Like I said, I've never sat through a whole episode of Gilmore Girls, so I can't vouch for that. But I can tell you that Dawson, Pacey, Jen, Jack, and ESPECIALLY Joey all spoke the same way. So they're not quirky. Within the context of the show, it's been established that "this is how teenagers talk."

Juno was much the same way. Within the first ten or so minutes, when Leah says "Honest to blog?!" after Juno reveals that she's pregnant, I cringed. First off, that expression doesn't even make any sense. It came off as a very desperate attempt to try to sound hip and young and pop-culturey. And, again, to some extent, Bleeker, Leah, and Juno (pretty much the only three teenage characters) all spoke the same way, negating that they're just quirky individuals. Michael Cera is absolutely hilarious and he plays those characters so well that you can't really criticize his performance, and Ellen Page is (in my opinion) tremendously likable and charming, so she can get away with it too. But the Leah character (specifically her dialogue) really hurt the film, in my opinion.

In regards to Juno in particular, her slangy way of speaking just felt too forced. She doesn't have to use slang or slip a pop culture reference in every single sentence she says. If a less charismatic actress was portraying the role, I really think that the film would have received very unfavorable reviews. Along with that -- and this echoes my point of a writer unsuccessfully trying to express the way she THINKS teenagers sound -- some of the things she said were just inaccurate. First off, Morgan Freeman wasn't even in The Bone Collector, Denzel Washington was. Secondly, it's "Thundercats HOOOOOO!" not "Thundercats are go!" Some people have defended these errors as Juno being an ignorant teenager. Sorry, I can't accept that. Not when she's able to make a Soupy Sales reference.

Great film? Without a doubt. Worth watching? Absolutely. Brilliant? Not quite.

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Cartoon Wars

So a few weeks ago, South Park took yet another shot at Family Guy. I enjoy both shows, but I thought I'd comment on this "Cartoon War" that has erupted between the fans of each show.

Like I said, I like both shows, so you can obviously like one without hating the other. If I was forced to choose, I'd say that I am more partial to Family Guy. I think the arguments made against Family Guy are perfectly valid and true, but they simply don't make any sense. While checking out the IMDb.com forums (the haven for highly intelligent conversations), somebody actually argued that Family Guy sacrifices plot for the sake of humor and pop culture references. Are you kidding me? Is this a joke? Family Guy is a comedy!!! Would you rather watch an absolutely hilarious episode of Family Guy, or an episode of Family Guy that told a fantastic story?

Have you ever heard anybody say "Wow, last night's episode of Family Guy (or South Park, for that matter) had an awesome plot"? No. People either say "that episode was hilarious" or "that episode wasn't all that funny."

Who the hell cares if Family Guy's jokes have absolutely nothing to do with the plot? For the life of me, I will never understand this argument. I sit and wonder if, when people watch this show, they actually say to themselves "oh man, that joke would have been hilarious if it was integral to the overall story." If it's funny, that's all that should matter. Even the early episodes (which I don't think are nearly as funny as the ones aired since the show returned) were more about jokes than the actual plot.

I really enjoy South Park -- most of the time, anyway -- but I also think they often give themselves way more credit than they deserve. Don't get me wrong, the show can be deceptively sophisticated, but when you sacrifice humor for messages, you're completely missing the point of a cartoon comedy (and, as such, really have no right for criticizing a comedy for sacrificing story for humor).

Just take a look at Robot Chicken, a show that has found success and a devoted following by completely eliminating plot and only offering random comedic sequences.

Personally, I hope Family Guy never responds to these jabs, because honestly, it makes Trey and Matt (creators of South Park) come off as exceptionally insecure and threatened.

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A Case of the.... New Amsterdam - The Complete First Season

I know I haven’t discussed this show since the first two episodes, and it has nothing to do with a lack of interest. Quite the contrary, in fact. It easily remains my favorite new show since Heroes, and I’ve thoroughly enjoyed every episode with each passing week. However, I unfortunately am unable to watch the show when it airs on Mondays, and by the time I do get to watch the episode, it’s usually only a couple days before the new episode airs. So, ultimately, I decided it’d be much easier and more effective to just write about the first season as a whole.

http://primetimepulse.insidepulse.com/2008/04/17/a-case-of-the-new-amsterdam-the-complete-first-season/

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Survivor thoughts

I'm still a big fan of Survivor, and I'm impressed with how the show has managed to remain pretty fresh while staying true to its original concept. But after 18,000 seasons, can we PLEASE quit it with the whole "half of the tribe gets a feast, and the other half gets all bitter about it" routine? I mean, PLEASE! Get the F over it already. This happens every single season. You lost the challenge, they won fair and square, and they deserve the feast. It's a competition, and it wasn't anything malicious. On top of that, 9.9 times out of 10, the losing team ASKS how it was, feigning interesting. Then, moments after the winning tribe spills the details, the losing tribe scurries off and talks crap about them. It's really tired and old. Get over it.

Click the "Read More" link for my thoughts on who got voted off.

The amazing thing about this episode was the way it made me really, really dislike pretty much everybody except Jason, and maybe Erik. Honestly, everybody else came off as exceptionally unlikable.

I'm a little torn about how I feel regarding the crew blatantly lying to Jason about not voting him off. My personal philosophy regarding the show has always been that you're competing to win one million dollars, you're not there to meet your new best friend. So if turning on a close ally is personally beneficial, more power to you. I've always felt that the person most deserving is the person that can get to the end and convince you to vote for them. As far as this game is concerned, I really don't necessarily believe you have to play honestly or honorably.

Yet, for some reason, the way this went down really left a bad taste in my mouth. Maybe it was that they not only lied to him about not voting him off, but they also arranged for him to basically get them a huge feast as well. It was just....particularly despicable. There was nothing really strategic about it....it was just mean.

And what the hell was with that finger crossing thing? Are we in freakin' 4th grade?

I also find it interesting how Alexis, an apparent motivational speaker, makes the biggest sour puss face when something didn't work out for her, and then calls somebody stupid for taking somebody else's word.

Oh, and I also found it funny how James -- the guy who got voted off while holding TWO immunity idols -- criticized Jason for playing stupidly.

As far as Ozzy goes, well, it couldn't have happened to a nicer guy. I've always liked him, but he was one of the people I referred to in the beginning who came off as very unlikable this episode. I also found his whole reaction to getting voted off pretty hypocritical. I mean, you basically spent the entire time between the immunity challenge and tribal council saying how it's about outwitting somebody, and it was foolish of Jason to take anybody's word. Oh, and he actually said "he'll just continue dominating challenges." Not at all like you would, right Ozzy? Well guess what, you just got outwitted.

Then to sarcastically say "Thanks, guys" after you get voted off. Please. I mean, you came up with this elaborative plot to vote off a guy you had promised you wouldn't vote off. But GOD FORBID they do that to you.

Highlight of the episode has to be Eliza's reaction, though.

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I failed to try...

So after coming (relatively) oh-so-close to fulfilling my new year's resolution yesterday evening, yet another opportunity came onto my lap today. Yes, once again, Little Miss Bilson was filming her segment in "New York, I Love You" (sans the blond wig) except this time, I got the friggin' ADDRESS that she's filming at. Not the general area, the actual SPOT.

Yet I couldn't take advantage. Alas, I had work....and even though I did manage to sneak out a half hour or so early, according to radio reports, traffic was an absolute MAD HOUSE because the Pope is in town. The drawbacks of living just outside the city, opposed to the city itself.

So, despite all those times that I've asked God for assistance in allowing me to meet my beautiful and beloved, he sends his messenger boy to act as my greatest obstacle.

In order to actually make this thing happen, here's hoping that within the the next 8 months, she either returns to New York City, or I get myself to LA.

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I tried....and failed....

I've made it known throughout the past few months that my new year's resolution is to meet -- and take a photo with -- the beautiful and beloved Rachel Bilson, sometime before the end of 2008. But hey, I'm realistic. I know she's (probably) not going to just show up at my front door.

So when I find out she's going to be in New York City to film a segment for the appropriately titled "New York, I Love You" -- AND that I would have off of work the very day she was filming -- the opportunity was just too good to pass up.

Unfortunately -- and not many people know this -- New York City is a pretty big place. Using my limited resources (basically entertainment and gossip websites, and a couple of filmmaker friends), all I could find out was that she was filming in "the downtown area." Again, that's a pretty wide spectrum to attack.

So, ultimately, I was unable to find the filming location. Making matters worse, when I got home, one of my sources had updated its information to the slightly more specific "Greenwich Village." So, alas, perhaps if I had known that earlier, I'd be posting a photo of myself and the lovely blond-wig-wearing actress.

But hey, I still have 8 months before the end of the year. Lets make this happen!

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Still gives me chills....

Unfortunately, this is the best video I could find of the closing moments of Heroes' first season finale. The background music really couldn't be any more inappropriate, as it really, REALLY takes away from the overall tone of the scene.

Really, everything about this scene was perfect. I still get chills when Nathan swoops in from the sky, turns Claire's gun away, and tells her that the future isn't set in stone (echoing what she had said to him earlier). And his "you saved the cheerleader, so we could save the world" may go down as one of the greatest lines ever uttered in television history.

Unfortunately, this finale acts as such a massive contrast to the second season's finale (which, I suppose, can be somewhat excused since it probably wasn't supposed to be the REAL finale). After this finale, it truly felt like everything was going to be different. Hiro had seemingly achieved his mission and was now in a different time period, preparing to meet his childhood hero. Nathan had come full circle and was possibly dead. Peter fulfilled his destiny and perhaps suffered the same fate. The tumultuous relationship between Claire and HRG (who we had finally learned the first name of) had climaxed with their touching reunion, and Nicki overcame her psychosis, reunited with her family, and proved that she was ultimately good and heroic. It truly felt like the culmination of a well built season. We got Peter vs. Sylar, Hiro vs. Sylar, Nicki and DL vs. Linderman, and HRG vs. The Company.

We also got some nice mirror-scenes. Peter had spent the first half of the season trying to save Claire's life, and now, in the finale, she was going to have to take his.

While season one's finale made me feel like everything would be different in season two, the second season's finale made me feel like season three would be much of the same. Nathan was possibly dead, again. HRG was back with the company and would make personal sacrifices for his family, again. Sylar was going to be the main antagonist, again.

And while season one ended with what felt like the culmination of all the main stories, I personally felt really gipped when I finished watching the end of season two. The last few episodes were clearly leading up to a Claire vs. Elle smackdown. And aside from that being enormously sexy, it made sense too. You had one girl who was protected by her Company father, and you had another who was manipulated and exploited by her Company father. One could heal, the other could inflict immense pain. Instead, we got Claire punching a window and Elle sucking up to her daddy.

Along with that, practically the entire season featured HRG and Mohinder against The Company. I feel like we got nothing out of that, at all. I appreciate that Mohinder drank the Kool-Aid and began to believe in what The Company was selling, but nothing really happened with that, either. If that was the path they were going to take, they should have had Mohinder shoot HRG in the eye in the finale, with the last scene being HRG's resurrection. That would have been cool, and would have been a proper send-off.

The volume --titled "Generations" -- also promised to provide us with information on the previous generation of heroes. Sure, we got a BIT of a history lesson on The Company, but we found out absolutely nothing about the abilities of the parent characters (Nathan and Peter's mom, Hiro's dad, etc). I understand that they may not want to make all of those revelations at once, but when you build an entire volume on the premise of the previous generation of heroes, that's the time to do it.

Honestly, at the end of season one I was not only salivating for season two....but I couldn't wait to buy the DVDs so that I could watch the whole season again. With season two....well, lets just say I wasn't devastated when I found out, after the writers strike, that the should wouldn't be coming back until September. I'll still watch it, and I am fully confident that it will be one of my top five favorite shows. But when it comes to comparing the two finales, there's no competition.

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THANK YOU!!!!

So tomorrow is the MS Walk, and I want to sincerely thank everybody who made a donation. Thanks to everybody's enormous generosity, I was able to exceed my goal of $500. In addition to the $430 in online pledges, I also received $155 in checks.

If you haven't made a donation, but you'd still like to, it's not too late! Pledges can be made until May 15th. Even if you can only sacrifice $5 or $10, it's still for a great cause so please do not hesitate.

Thanks again to everybody who made a donation. Your thoughtfulness is appreciated and will not be forgotten.

http://main.nationalmssociety.org/goto/mattbasilo

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Paranoid much?

http://coaches.aol.com/love-and-sex/julia-hartley-moore/cheating-tips?icid=100214839x1159802205x1080132693

So according to this private investigator, if your partner wears a new shirt, changes his hairstyle, and uses his cell phone a lot, it should be a neon sign that he's cheating. This type of crap annoys me, how these supposed experts prey on people's fears in order to shill their book or latest product.

So guys, be sure to never try to improve yourself or -- GASP! -- lose weight, because that evidently means you're cheating. Crap. Utter crap.

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An elephant painting an elephant

Pretty incredible, actually (not to mention that it's a fairly impressive drawing by human standards). I love how the elephant does the phantom paint strokes before making contact with the canvas, like many real artists do.

For anybody skeptical, Snopes.com has confirmed that this is in fact authentic:

http://www.snopes.com/photos/animals/elephantpainting.asp

As a side note, I love how the spectators go from absolute, utter amazement to saying things like "what about the tail?" about halfway through.

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Beyond Belief: Fact or Fiction

So I recently ordered the first season of Beyond Belief: Fact or Fiction on DVD, and I just finished watching it (disappointingly, the first set only includes six episodes). For those of you not familiar with this show, it's basically a mix between the Twilight Zone and Unsolved Mysteries. Each episode tells about five stories, each of which have something supernatural or peculiar happening, and at the end of the episode, the host reveals which stories are fictional, and which were inspired by true events. It's a neat little show for anybody who enjoys freaky, ghost story around the campfire type tales.

Anyway, while I'm still a huge fan of the show (I will be buying each season as they're released), I do also realize I was probably remembering the show with some rose-colored glasses. The acting isn't all that great, but that's expected (although every now and then you'll recognize an actor from before he or she landed a "big" break). But the two things that jumped out at me was the need to hammer home certain points to a ridiculous extent, and the apparent inability for most characters to "act" things out.

The latter observation was especially noticeable in the story titled "E-mail" (from Episode 4). We couldn't simply watch the secretary exchange e-mails with the spirit.....nor could we just allow the natural flow of logic transpire. Instead, we needed her to narrate every action she took. She'd read each e-mail she received out loud, then she'd orally respond before she types out what she had just said. When the spirit instructs her to find his niece, instead of showing her thinking, and then looking in the phonebook (as anyway would naturally do), they have her say "How? How do I find her?" and then practically spells it out with "I know, I'll look in the phone book!"

The second episode's "The Subway" is a great example of using a sledgehammer to drive home a point. In that episode, a couple get onto a subway that goes nowhere, with some creepy looking guy as the only other passenger. They're so thoroughly freaked that they get off at the first stop, which turns out to be the one they originally got onto, and immediately return home. Upon their arrival, they discover that their neighbor accidentally left the gas on. They're able to save her, but only because of the freaky subway ride. When they're in their neighbor's apartment, they see a picture of her late husband, which is of course the creepy man on the subway. The neighbor then feels the need to absolutely, positively dumb down the entire segment for us by stating that her husband promised to always protect and look over her. It's like, yeah, we already pieced together that message, despite its immense complexity, a while ago.

Anyway, the premise is cool, and definitely worth checking out if you're a fan of the whole sci-fi genre or if you appreciate shows like Unsolved Mysteries and the Twilight Zone. But be warned, there's only six episodes, and it comes with absolutely no special features whatsoever. This is really too bad, because it would have been cool if the DVD included the details on the actual stories that the "Fact" stories were based upon (of course, this would also reveal how many creative liberties the reenactment took). Anyway, if you've never seen the show before, this may be something you might want to rent before dishing out $15-20 to purchase it.

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Have you FREAKING lost it?

Lets hear it for Kurt Angle, the latest person to go from highly respected within his industry to an absolute kook who has seemingly lost it. Honestly, who allows this guy to talk to the media? He comes off as an absolute quack. Between TNA management and his supposed handlers, shouldn't somebody be putting a muzzle on him?

Take his latest interview with Fighting Spirit Magazine, for instance. How about these gems....

Kurt on TNA's ratings:

Kurt Freaking Angle: I’m excited about it. I just can’t believe how high our ratings are. I knew that we were doing good ratings, but I didn’t know we were pretty close to the Raw ratings, so I’m real excited.

Um, what? "Pretty close to the Raw ratings"??? The week before WrestleMania, when Raw typically does high ratings, and TNA had their first live edition of Impact (which should, theoretically, bring higher than usual ratings), Raw did a 3.9 cable rating. Impact, meanwhile, brought in a 0.4 cable rating. Raw's ratings were nearly TEN TIMES higher. How in the freakin' hell is that "pretty close"? Damn, even the Hall of Fame ceremony -- where fans are basically watching a black tie gala -- did a 2.1. I don't know a damn soul who watches AM Raw, and even THAT managed to beat TNA, with a 0.8 cable rating. And the show airs at 1 in the morning!

TNA has exploded. We’ve not exploded in ratings, but little by little – 30,000, 25,000 fans a week – it keeps going up. One week we did a 1.1, then a 1.2, then 1.35 – that’s small ratings and it’s about two million people, but the next week, God willing, that’s going to be two point one million. So, after a little while, you’re doing three million people. Now you’re doing the same ratings as SmackDown, so then what do you do? You go after Raw. They’re doing four million, so we take it to that level.

So first you were "pretty close to the Raw ratings" and now you're admitting that you've only achieved 1.35 at your absolute highest? And sorry Kurt, but you're NOT doing the same ratings as Smackdown. ECW, which is the red headed step child of WWE, averages a 1.3 rating.

Kurt on his impact in the industry:

I even heard that he (Jay Lethal) cried for real, because he beat Kurt Angle. It’s like beating Stone Cold or The Rock.

Yeah, Kurt....just like that.

Chris Jericho will never reach the top echelon that Undertaker, Hunter, Shawn, myself and Sting are at.

And later....

I can’t tell you who, but we’re working on a fight with Randy (Couture). If that falls through, Tito’s (Ortiz) up. We’re actually the same weight, so neither of us has to change. It won’t be 205, it won’t be heavyweight, it’ll be me and him at 215 just going at it. I don’t wanna have a warm-up match – I’m too big for that right now, too popular. I won an Olympic gold medal, there’s no need for me to have a warm-up. I’d rather just go against one of the top guys and do it. If I win, great. If I lose, then that’s okay.

Yeah, this guy really has an awfully inflated perspective on where he stands in the industry, doesn't he?

Kurt on being a part-timer:

First he says....

KFA: The thing that separates us from WWE is that you’re going to see the exact same superstars that are on TV. That’s the difference between TNA and WWE...we bring all of our talent to every one of our shows. WWE can’t say that because Shawn Michaels doesn’t come, The Undertaker doesn’t come.

Then he says....

In WWE, I asked for that – I asked to go part time like those guys and Vince said, “I can’t do it. We have five hours of programming – you’re too important”. Well, screw you, Vince. I gave you seven years of my life. Five broken necks. F**k you.

And then even LATER he says....

KFA: Nah. Listen, we’ve made Kurt Angle bigger than TNA. So, what do you do with somebody that’s bigger than your company – exploit them and run them into the ground? No. Kurt Angle is probably going to do 45 house shows a year instead of 100, so I don’t have to worry about doing too much.

Wow, Kurt, you gave up on that "all of our guys are at every show" stance pretty quickly, didn't you?

So you're criticizing Shawn Michaels and The Undertaker -- and by proxy, WWE -- because they have a part time schedule, yet you quit the company because they wouldn't give YOU that? Interesting....

As a side note, I do fully believe that Angle SHOULD have been granted a part-time schedule when he requested it, due to the condition that he was in.

Kurt on pushing the little guy:

So I asked, “Vince – what are you doing? Why are we picking up guys like Batista, who are 6’5”, 300 pounds and can’t even wrestle?” This was back when he couldn’t wrestle – he can now. I was saying, “Why don’t we pick up AJ – he’s only 190 pounds but he’s f**king awesome!” And Vince was like, “Kurt, you’re the real deal, so you can be 5’10”, 200 pounds, but we need the big guys.” “No we don’t, Vince – don’t discriminate! Let a 5’9” guy win the title!”

With all due respect, Batista managed to headline more than one WrestleMania, quite successfully so, and was essentially one of the top 5 guys in the company. And in the past few years, we've seen Rey Mysterio, Chris Jericho, Chris Benoit, Eddie Guerrero, and Kurt Angle -- all guys who are 5'11" or less (Mysterio is like 5'3") -- hold World Championships. If you want to count the ECW Championship, throw CM Punk, John Morrison, and Chavo Guerrero in there as well. Along with that, guys like Shawn Michaels, Edge, King Booker, and Randy Orton aren't exactly muscle bound freaks.

Incidentally, since Kurt Angle has joined TNA, the only World Champs we've seen are Sting, Angle, Abyss, and Christian. None of THOSE guys are 5'9". In fact, the only time AJ Styles -- the very main Angle praises as f'n awesome -- sees the main event, it's to be the comic-relief lackey for either Christian or Angle himself.

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The latest Lost theory...

Earlier today I read a Lost theory over at Doc Jensen's column on EW.com, and I immediately fell in love with it. Click below to get the details, with my thoughts. There's nothing particularly spoiler-ific in it, but I suppose you best not read it if you haven't yet viewed "Meet Kevin Johnson."

I'd also like to thank everybody who voted in the Aaron/Oceanic Six poll. I was surprised by two things: The amount of people that voted, and that somebody other than me still feels strongly enough to argue that Aaron isn't part of the group!

Anyway, click below for the super duper awesome theory.

So according to this new theory, the past, present, and future concurrently exist on the island. However, they exist on a different plane, preventing any given character from running into their former or future selves.

This theory carries some weight, if you think about it. It may explain why the island doesn't allow certain people to commit suicide. Perhaps the future IS written in stone. If it has already been determined that Michael and Jack arrive on the island in the future, nothing they do in the past can prevent them from reaching that point. Therefore, they can't die simply because, in the future, they've already returned to the island. This may also explain how Locke has managed to survive numerous wounds which would have likely killed a normal man.

This can also be demonstrated on the reverse side of the coin with Charlie. Recall that no matter what Desmond did, Charlie was still destined to die. If he wasn't struck by lightning, he drowned attempting to rescue Claire. If he didn't get shot in the chest with an arrow, he gave up his life to save everyone else. It's the same principle: In the future, Charlie is dead. And no matter what, in some form or fashion, that will come to fruition.

The other thing I like about the "past, present, and future existing all at once" theory is that it may just explain Taller Ghost Walt. He was unquestionably taller, but what if he wasn't a ghost? It's already been theorized that the "present" and "future" characters cannot co-exist, but what happens when a present character leaves the island? If his future counterpart is on the island, would he magically appear?

This requires you to use your imagination (not an unreasonable request given the premise of the series). Lets say the Oceanic Six does return to the island, but they take Walt with him (perhaps he finds out what Michael did, and decides he wants to reconcile with his father, realizing that he wants redemption). When Michael and Walt left the island, perhaps the future Walt suddenly gained the ability to communicate with the "past"/present characters.

This leads to a really fun possibility: When the Oceanic Six DO leave, imagine if future Jack, Kate, Hurley, Sayid, Sun, and (ugh) Aaron suddenly emerged from the jungle?

The other really fun possible explanation: What if these "jungle whispers" are actually the voices of the characters from the future? Perhaps when the past and future characters are at the same place at the same time, one side "echoes" to the other....

Of course, this theory isn't without its share of flaws. First off, we've already seen Walt, at his original height, make numerous paranormal island visits. I'm also curious about what happens when one of The Others makes their frequent trips off the island. Does Richard Alpert, from the future, fill Ben in on what's going to happen in the future? It may explain how Ben gets some of his information, but if the future truly is set in stone, why would he bother trying to alter it (surely he of all people would know the rules of the island)?

Like many Lost theories, this may have you saying "that explains it!" just as often as it has you scratching your head. I'm not fully sure that I believe it to be true, but it's definitely a fun possibility that explains many of the show's mysteries.

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The Paparazzi

A couple of weekends ago I inadvertently instigated an argument between two people regarding the paparazzi, which ended up getting relatively heated. Fret not, as I didn't get out of this unscathed, as I was subjected to a rather uncomfortable car ride.

Nevertheless, the issue got me thinking. One person -- lets call him Tim (not his real name) -- argued on behalf of the paparazzi. The other person -- lets call her Tiff (not her real name, either) -- condemned their actions. I kept pretty quiet and stood someplace in the middle, although I sided more with Tiff than Tim.

My biggest issue with Tim's argument is the fact that everything the paparazzi does can be blamed on somebody else. First it was the celebrities' fault, because they chose that lifestyle. Then it was the public's fault, because they created the demand for all of these personal and intrusive photos. I mean, at SOME point the paparazzi have to be responsible for what they do, right? I also don't believe that people should get something simply because they demand it.

Tim also argued that they're just "doing their job." In my mind, that's a pretty weak point. I mean, hell, a hitman is just doing his job when he murders somebody. That's an admittedly extreme example, but nevertheless, simply doing your job doesn't give you the excuse to do something terrible.

However, Tiff's stance seemed to be the polar opposite. She seemed to believe that celebrities should be immune to having photos taken of them altogether. According to her, they are entitled to total privacy. I can't say I agree with that, either.

While celebrities do have rights, they don't have special rights. Let me put it this way: If I'm walking down the street and I see a really, really hot woman and I snap a photo of her, I'm not doing anything illegal (as far as I know). It may be creepy, but it's not illegal. With that in mind, I don't think there's anything particularly wrong with taking a photo of a celebrity shopping or exercising or pumping gas or while they're at the beach or doing whatever in public. I mean, hell, I'll openly admit that if I ever see Lady Bilson strolling down the street, you better bet your ass that I'll find some way to ensure I have a camera to snap some shots.

There is a limit, though. I find what they're doing to Britney Spears absolutely reprehensible. I mean, they swarm her to the extent that she literally cannot find her car, which is parked on the street. When she DOES finally find her car, she can't even pull out of her spot because there's such a mass of people surrounding her. It's disgusting.

There are other instances where the paparazzi practically initiate a car chase in order to get some precious photo, which is not only dangerous for them and the celebrity, but for everybody else on the street (both driving and walking) as well.

Is there a solution here? I know that government interference is a highly unattractive notion to most people, but why not regulate the whole paparazzi occupation? Force all paparazzi must get a license, and make it so that printed publications can ONLY purchase photos from somebody who has a license. But, there are also some standards, like that you must stay X feet away from your subject when taking photos and that you can't create a public disturbance or unsafe environment. You can create an organization similar to the FCC to ensure that publications are compliant and to determine fines and punishments for failure to do so.

Consider that many occupations require a license of some sort. You need a license for television and radio broadcasts (in some places, anyway), to sell real estate, to drive, to fly, and so on and so forth. I mean, hell, in most places you need a license to FISH. To fish!

On top of that, many occupations have become unionized anyway (despite my general disdain for unions).

Of course, this'll never happen. I do hope that something does, however. If we use the supply and demand justification, eventually the public will demand something even more exorbitant. And after they receive that, they'll want something more. At what point will it end?

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